Conflict? Ask Ken: Five Frequently Asked Questions

1.  How should the work of a church mediator be understood?
The concept of an “embedded” reporter during th e war against Saddam Hussein's regime provides a useful analogy to the work of a mediator. How so?  The peacemaker enters into the very middle of the conflict but maintains an objectivity and impartiality that the disputants themselves do not have.

2.  What is mediation and how does it differ from arbitration?
Mediation is a communication and problem-solving process whereby disputants work to find a mutually acceptable resolution to their differences through the help of a third party (cp. Phil. 4:2-3).  The mediator helps identify individual needs and interests, helps generate options for mutual gain, and facilitates negotiation resulting in a final agreement that the parties themselves create.  For most people, mediation is the preferred form of dispute resolution. What sets mediation apart from other forms of dispute resolution, is that the parties themselves are in control of the result.  In other words, while the mediator, by-and-large, controls the process, the participants, by-and-large, control the outcome. One of the major distinctions between mediation and arbitration is who is in control of the decision making process.  In mediation, the parties themselves are in charge.  The peacemaker serves as a facilitator to help the parties work out their differences. 

In arbitration, the third party arbiter will impose a binding decision on the disputants (cp. I Cor. 6:5).  This is certainly true if a dispute reaches a court.  In addition, mediation and arbitration differ in their orientation.  Arbitration is focused more in the past.  Mediation is focused more toward the future.  Whereas arbitration typically involves making a determination of who was right and who was wrong in days gone by, mediation considers ways the parties can relate and work together in the days ahead.

3.  Is mediation a Biblical concept?
Most definitely!  In 1 Timothy 2:5 we read, For there is one God and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus.  According to the standard Greek lexicon of the NT the meaning of the word “mediator” in this context is, one who mediates between two parties to remove a disagreement or reach a common goal.  Mediating follows the pattern that Jesus established as a mediator between mankind and God.  Indeed, Jesus put His blessing upon the one who would intervene as a peacemaker (Matthew 5:9).

4.  What is the most significant benefit of mediation?
The greatest benefit of mediation is that it holds out the promise of preserving the relationships of fellow Christians.  A house divided cannot stand (Mat. 12:25) and is contrary to everything Jesus wants for His followers (John 13:34-35).  Mediating a conflict is far more "people friendly" than most other, if not all, conflict resolution processes.  It holds the promise of preserving relationships, even strengthening them as the parties work through their issues together in a constructive manner.

5.  How does "Biblically-based" mediation differ from other mediation
     proceedings?
While agreements reached through mediation proceedings must not overstep the bounds of the law (or a church's by-laws), agreements reached through Biblically-based mediation additionally must not overstep Biblical parameters. The participants enter into mediation with the shared understanding that they are subject to the authority of both the state and God.  For the Christian, entering into mediation should be seen as the bold practice of one’s faith

For Discussion:
Church mediation, at times, is given a bad name because some of those who call themselves church mediators have never studied or received training in the field.  Typically, their end product is a “report” of findings (and fault) without reconciliation.  Rather than uniting disputing parties, existing divisions are deepened.  This is not peacemaking.  Question:  What has your experience with church mediation been, good or bad?  What should the rest of us look for and avoid?

FOR OTHER ARTICLES BY KEN ON CHURCH CONFLICT... click here

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  © 2005 Kenneth C. Newberger
Ken Newberger, an experienced church conflict resolution specialist, earned his Th.M. from Dallas Theological Seminary, has ten years senior pastoral experience, and is in the dissertation phase for his Ph.D. in Conflict Analysis and Resolution at Nova Southeastern University, one of only two accredited doctoral programs of its kind in the United States. If your church needs help resolving conflict, if you need individual coaching, or if you would like to introduce a proactive conflict management system into your church, please visit Ken's website at www.ResolveChurchConflict.com  or call 301-253-8877.

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